The None Money Challenge!

no more money
Accurate portrayal of the author.

Because none money is what I have. I have an impulse control disorder and it forced me to buy loads of things that I don’t need, so now I need to pay council tax and all that bullshit, and have to actually be mindful of my financial situation. I have never, ever in my life, ever, had any kind of handle on my money. It’s like the weather or something, it happens, it flows. Turns out that my version of budgetary Daoism was flawed: all the money flowed away in a beautiful river down a verdant hillside, never to be seen again.

So now I am poor(er than usual). But I’m also feeling very amused by life right now. Poverty can be fun!*

It’s time for a game.

For 14 days, I will spend no money. Not on food, or fags, or anything. There are rules and exceptions.

  1. I may borrow, barter, or scavenge. Freegan rules apply.
  2. Begging and wheedling are strongly discouraged.
  3. Travel is an exception.
  4. Camping supplies are an exception. I’m camping at Nine Ladies for a few days and, while the beautiful Solstice Crew would probably feed me if I asked, see Rule #2. Also the idea of camping with no cider is inhumane.
  5. One night on the piss each weekend is also included, because this is not a sobriety challenge. That would be a whole other (and worser) ballgame.

skint

For each day of success, I will donate £2 to charity (which one to be decided later. This is an impulsive scheme I came up with last night so I haven’t quite squared away the details.)
I’ll be collecting donations as well, I’ll get a tin to shake and everything.

This ludicrous scheme will run from the 14th – 28th June (inclusive).

I encourage you all to follow my progress as I make increasingly bizarre meals out of random store cupboard ingredients. I have tinned mushy peas and a bag of dried squid… This is going to turn into an interesting cooking show.

zizek-animate

*Poverty is actually not fun and is associated with a wide range of life limiting factors including mental and physical ill health, domestic violence victimisation and addiction. Act to end poverty by donating to… Oh God I sound like Bono, please donate me a gun so I can end this now.

Give your cash to any grassroots charity or help scheme, your local homelessness charity or foodbank. There are a lot of people who are genuinely struggling for food even in this supposedly wealthy country, and it’s a crime. I’m lucky to have supportive people and benefits and a community. Some folks don’t have these things, so let’s try and look out for each other. x

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The None Money Challenge!

Just an Update.

I did the abseil.

It wasn’t frightening.

Sponsor me here, if you so feel. It’s for Derbyshire Refugee Solidarity.

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I was kind of hungover for abseiling, because the night before was a truly uniquely beautiful night at City-Zen One Mic. So many talented people, and I got up and did a couple of new spoken word bits. People come together to create and talk bollocks and drink and dance and it’s magic. And raised £100 for Rojava Solidarity.

 

Spent the rest of the weekend with family, which was really nice. We all live kind of far apart, so it’s great when we do get together. Stayed up way too late putting the world to rights (and I managed not to get into any terrible political arguments even though my family are not yet woke to the true necessity of anarchism).

 

These things have been good beyond measure. In between times, things have been bad beyond measure. I don’t know if I’m actually losing it. Fuck abseiling, this is the real extreme sport. The mood graph prickles like a porcupine and shoots a facefull of quills into my idiot life. Trying to hold while everything spins. I’m too dizzy to run anywhere. My hands hurt.

My fucking heart hurts.

 

 

Just an Update.

Being an Optimist for Once, in the midst of all this Shit. After all, there’s work to be done.

I braved it and made a video clip. First verse of my new poem, Faith in Humanity (People are Strange). This the first time I’ve ever done a spoken selfie video, so I apologise for my face.

 

We’re snowed under with desperate political commentary and the End of The World is being predicted again. Evil is afoot. But helping out with the thousands of donations given to just one grassroots charity, has really driven home the fact that there are a lot of people who do want to do a little bit of good. The world is changing, maybe in the cracks wrought by the earthquakes we can plant new seeds, seeds of a world where no one has to flee their home, no one is coerced, and no one has to see Donald Trump’s face ever again.

If you’d like to see me do more poetry, along with 13 super talented acts wh will put me in the absolute shade, come to City-Zen: One Mic! Rojava Solidarity Network fundraiser. Last One Mic! night was absolutely beautiful, so come on down to the Maypole in Derby tomorrow evening.

To sponsor me abseiling down a 110 foot building for Derbyshire Refugee Solidarity, go to this link.  You saw us in the video, please give us a hand.

To watch me (along with many other insane brave and committed people) abseil down the building, come to Jurys Inn, Derby, this Saturday at 1pm. It’s be a laugh. Or I might cry, who knows? It’s the suspense that makes it interesting, right?

 

Being an Optimist for Once, in the midst of all this Shit. After all, there’s work to be done.

NO SURRENDER!

The music video is out! Hope in dark times. There are so many of us with mental health problems. We can support each other in this struggle.

WATCH THIS! [CW: depression, self harm]

Hope you like it. No shame in scars. I’m just glad they could be useful, turning the signs of self-destruction into creative vision.

This video was so fun to make, despite the serious subject matter. Massive respect to JD, Sire and Self Taught for making this song, and Evil Unicorn for the amazing video. Thank you for letting me be a part of something amazing.

DOWNLOAD THE EP HERE, NAME YOUR PRICE! Five excellent tracks, well worth it. All proceeds go towards setting up a youth group providing mental health support. Young peoples’ mental health treatment is horribly underfunded, and although the majority of mental illnesses begin during adolescence, 50% receive no treatment whatsoever. (I recommend you read this report, there are some shocking statistics in there.)

I was lucky to be seen by CAMHS (Child & Adolescent Mental Health Services) as a teenager, which was about enough to keep me alive. I consider myself lucky even for that, because I know plenty of people whose teen years were blighted by undiagnosed or clinically neglected psychological issues. I wonder sometimes how my life would be different if I’d been diagnosed earlier. Maybe my young adulthood would have been a lot easier. Maybe I’d have a few less scars, and would never have been able to be in this video. Which is just one of many reasons that I don’t want to change the past. I’m thankful to be where I am right now. I just acknowledge that it is much more difficult, now I’m finally in treatment, to break habits and thought patterns that have been part of my being for over a decade. I don’t want any other kid to have to suffer so much.

NO SURRENDER!

Weekend was good

I performed and I sucked. But saw some amazing poets and artists. Spent time with a bunch of my bestest friends. Boat times, Hive times, flat times with little hypoallergenic cat so I didn’t die!

I didn’t take any photos at all. I never do when I’m actually busy having a good time. Hopefully someone else took some. Also I wish there was a video of Karoo Chanti, amazing spoken word artist who left the room weeping, I’m not exaggerating here, she bared her tears on stage and brought our tears out also, baring witness reading eyewitness accounts of genocide in Serbia and how the ‘International community’  and UN fucked off and left humans to be slaughtered.

LoudSpeka and Cosmic HipHop were brilliant, the whole night was amazing. Apologies, I know I’ve not mentioned some people but my brain is mush right now. I’ll just say that the performers were amazing, the space was amazing, and the audience was incredibly giving and inclusive. Such an amazing atmosphere, I’ve never seen anything like it. I’ve realised a whole other world exists, and it’s better than the one I usually inhabit. May there be many more events like this.

Just sad I didn’t stay to sneak into the Burning Man Decompression After-Afterparty, which from eyewitness reports was a sweaty glittery genderfuck unicorn fairy cuddle orgy.

***

Good news everybody! We raised enough money from Spoken Word, for the soup run to carry on until Spring, including some Christmas presents for these folks who would otherwise be looking at a pretty bleak Winter of fuck-all. It’s been blowing a gale with this Hurricane Barney or whatever  it’s called, but the soup volunteers went out last night. Nights like that, imagine living on the street. Just the simple gift of warm soup could save your life.

God Bless Brian, who organised the poetry night and who runs the soup run with his church. He’s fighting cancer and fibromyalgia and should be in bed but instead he is running about kicking ass and helping so many people, as well as being a good friend and looking after my stupid ass.

Thank you Brian, thank you Hive for hosting us and being generally cool, and thank you performers and audience alike. You made beautiful vibes, a night to remember, for a cause never to forget. Love. ❤

 

Weekend was good